Don't take things for granted

D

Dark Macc

New member
Well, I fucked up. I mean, I've known this for a long time, I admitted to being wrong in the past, because I was. I really was. I did mess up our relationship and I accepted that and we split. It was perfectly fair.

Today hit me hard, though. It's 4:20 am, and I realized that had nothing happened months ago -- had I not fucked up -- that in four hours I'd be getting on a plane to fly out there and be with her. Thanksgiving and my birthday would ahve been different for once, they would have been special and meant something to me. It would have been invigorating and exciting. I would have been happy. Actually happy.

However, I admit to my mistake, and I am paying for it. Heh, this must be God's divine punishment. This is my retribution, obviously. I pay, emotionally, every day for this. Because I took for granted what I had and didn't cherish it every day like I should have. Had I done that, remembered what I had and how quickly I could lose it, perhaps I wouldn't be spending the holidays alone.

Or perhaps this was all part of fate. Perhaps this was written from the start -- that I was supposed to stay home with parents who wont allow me to eat dinner with them anymore.

I really only have one thing to tell everyone who reads this: cherish what you have. Realize you could have it taken away in one moment, and that it really is important. If it's a person, let them know -- tell them you love them, tell them how much they mean to you. Don't make the same mistakes I did. Don't take it for granted.

You don't want to pay for it everyday and wish you could go back and change it.

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< Juggaleaux > wait. I think DarkMacc is Christ.</P>
 
This is going to sting a bit...

This probably isn't the best time to give such advice, but its when I am awake so in your own words: Deal.

I can tell from your post what probably occured. And dude, as much as it sucks, it may be a good thing. My advice is to take all that cash you saved for that plane ticket and, now make sure you read this correctly, don't spend it on anime. That's right. Do not, under any circumstances spend the large sum of cash you have accumulated on more boxsets. Take some advice from me about this. Take that money, and buy some nice ass clothes. Not what you or I would consider nice ass clothes, what members of the opposite sex who have no idea what anime is outside of Pokemon consider nice clothes. And then just start going places. I mean shit dude, you have been doing this whole "online love" thing for about 4-5 years now? And what have you truly gotten out of it? An emotional crutch for when you start to think about how shitty life can be? Sure. But outside of phone conversations and 2 meetings that I know of, what have you really gotten from this relationship? I know this may not be what you want to hear, but after some time to heal, its time to find yourself someone who is really going to be there. Someone who when you feel like shit you can hold in your arms, and not just over a computer screen. The online relationship thing can only go on for so long unless there is some kind of steady visitation. This whole thing you have been doing all these years of building your whole life around this girl who you have only spent maybe 2 weeks tops with in the flesh is not healthy man. All this time I have been just saying "whatever makes him happy", but still dude. Yeah I know a lot of shitty girls are out there, and you will probably meet quite a number of them if you decide to actually take my advice here. But this is your choice: Go through this whole little cycle of basing your whole life around someone who for all intents and purposes is nothing more than 1's and 0's, or putting up with some crappy girls in the hopes of actually finding someone who can really be good for you. The choice is yours dude, I hope you will make the right one. ANd if you need to vent, bitch, or just need some advice, then you know my number.

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Re: This is going to sting a bit...

> I can tell from your post what probably occured.

Except what you're thinking didn't occour. It was cross posted from my journal, where people have no clue what is actually going on. And besides, I spent that money a long time ago. The point of my post was thus:

Cherish what you have. Realize you could have it taken away in one moment, and that it really is important. If it's a person, let them know -- tell them you love them, tell them how much they mean to you. Don't take them for granted.

That was the whole point of the entire post. The rest was just how I was forced to realize it.

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< Juggaleaux > wait. I think DarkMacc is Christ.</P>
 
So what happened?? I thought that you two got back together again. I guess I was wrong. Anyways I think that it's best that you take freeze's advice. You may not want to hear that, but it will help in the long run. If you need to talk I'm always here to listen. You know my screen name in AIM.

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> So what happened?? I thought that you two got back together
> again. I guess I was wrong. Anyways I think that it's best
> that you take freeze's advice. You may not want to hear
> that, but it will help in the long run. If you need to talk
> I'm always here to listen. You know my screen name in AIM.

As I was saying, we didn't reseperate. It was cross-posted from my personal journal where a good deal of people who read it have no clue about my normal life and what has happened since we first broke up.

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< Juggaleaux > wait. I think DarkMacc is Christ.</P>
 
> with parents who wont allow me to eat dinner with them
> anymore.
>

<img src=smilies/eek5.gif> Man...

I hope you get to spend Thanksgiving with a friend or loved one. Nobody should have to eat Thanksgiving dinner alone. /wwwthreads/images/icons/frown.gif

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> Man...
>
> I hope you get to spend Thanksgiving with a friend or loved
> one. Nobody should have to eat Thanksgiving dinner alone.

I went to eat dinner with them one day and they told me to get the fuck out of the kitchen and they didn't want me to eat with them. Needless to say, I find myself eating in my room all the time now. <img src=smilies/headshake.gif>

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< Juggaleaux > wait. I think DarkMacc is Christ.</P>
 
> I went to eat dinner with them one day and they told me to
> get the fuck out of the kitchen and they didn't want me to
> eat with them. Needless to say, I find myself eating in my
> room all the time now.
>

Whoah. That really sucks. <img src=smilies/headshake.gif>

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> I went to eat dinner with them one day and they told me to
> get the fuck out of the kitchen and they didn't want me to
> eat with them.

Shoot them in their fucking faces.

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"Kupo, motherfucker!! DO YOU SPEAK IT!?"</P>
 
> I hope you get to spend Thanksgiving with a friend or loved
> one. Nobody should have to eat Thanksgiving dinner alone.

Not only will I be alone, but I won't even be having a Thanksgiving dinner. <img src=smilies/cry.gif>

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> Not only will I be alone, but I won't even be having a
> Thanksgiving dinner.
>
Hop on one of your rich princeton jet planes and come have thanksgiving dinner with me and Jenn! That is if you don't mind being forced to sit through "Transformers: The Movie"


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> I went to eat dinner with them one day and they told me to
> get the fuck out of the kitchen and they didn't want me to
> eat with them. Needless to say, I find myself eating in my
> room all the time now.

what the hell is wrong with your parents?? What could you have done to piss them off that much? Bring a dead body to the kitchen, say "more meat for the table", and plop it in the sink?

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> Hop on one of your rich princeton jet planes

<img src=smilies/cwm27.gif>

The university may be rich, but grad students don't see a cent of it. It usually goes to expanding the stadium or bailing the undergrads out of prison on drinking nights.

Thanks for the invitation, though. <img src=smilies/magbiggrin.gif>

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> Thanks for the invitation, though.
>
Side note: after actually sitting through the transformers movie for the first time since early childhood, why the hell did I like that movie? Unicron was badass, but other than that... ewww...

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> Side note: after actually sitting through the transformers
> movie for the first time since early childhood, why the hell
> did I like that movie? Unicron was badass, but other than
> that... ewww...

The term "blackboard" is racist because it refers to something that has white stuff written all over it, implying that we're all black underneath.

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huh?

> The term "blackboard" is racist because it refers to
> something that has white stuff written all over it, implying
> that we're all black underneath.
>

<img src=smilies/eek13.gif>

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> Not only will I be alone, but I won't even be having a
> Thanksgiving dinner.
>

Man, I'm sorry to hear that. =(

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