The way I'am (long post)
- Thread starter cbxweb
- Start date
The 9th Sage
New member
> this is a long post, leave now if your not going to be
> prepared to read for 10-15 mintues.
Sounds like you're in a state of flux. I think, from how it sounds, that the most important thing for you to do right now is to build your self confidence up. I know how it is to have no confidence in one's self, and believe me that life is a lot more tolerable when you have confidence in yourself.
One of my major problems I think was that I was made fun of quite a bit in my earlier school days, so I ended up putting up this defensive shield that was only down around those I knew well (I was very mercurial, if I thought someone was making fun of me I had a tendency to flip out, usually for stupid things). Anyone who knows me now knows I have a temper, but that I'm also very patient, so I guess I have changed since then.
Anyway, One tip I guess I can give is a change of scenery may help you...I remember that my feeling of self worth improved a lot once I got out of high school, probably because in the back of my head even after the assinine jocks making fun of me had stopped I remembered.
And focus on something that makes you happy, be it your music or something else. A good hobby helps a hell of a lot towards stress relief I find....but then I also find that a good round of DooM helps too.
To comment on something else, I know how it is too to feel lost. I'm a bit like that now, I don't have a specific goal except for working my way towards my own apartment...that will be excellent.
All I can say there is to do some serious soul searching and thinking about yourself. Good luck whatever you end up doing.
> prepared to read for 10-15 mintues.
Sounds like you're in a state of flux. I think, from how it sounds, that the most important thing for you to do right now is to build your self confidence up. I know how it is to have no confidence in one's self, and believe me that life is a lot more tolerable when you have confidence in yourself.
One of my major problems I think was that I was made fun of quite a bit in my earlier school days, so I ended up putting up this defensive shield that was only down around those I knew well (I was very mercurial, if I thought someone was making fun of me I had a tendency to flip out, usually for stupid things). Anyone who knows me now knows I have a temper, but that I'm also very patient, so I guess I have changed since then.
Anyway, One tip I guess I can give is a change of scenery may help you...I remember that my feeling of self worth improved a lot once I got out of high school, probably because in the back of my head even after the assinine jocks making fun of me had stopped I remembered.
And focus on something that makes you happy, be it your music or something else. A good hobby helps a hell of a lot towards stress relief I find....but then I also find that a good round of DooM helps too.
To comment on something else, I know how it is too to feel lost. I'm a bit like that now, I don't have a specific goal except for working my way towards my own apartment...that will be excellent.
All I can say there is to do some serious soul searching and thinking about yourself. Good luck whatever you end up doing.
> Why do you not move out than? Check to see if you can find
> your own place for a reasonable rent.
Perhaps the reason why he doesn't want to is the guilt trip that would follow, as he says he's paying for food, and if he were to leave, so would the nutritions.
Cbx, you should really just basically print this up and hand it to your mom. You need to get things straightened out, and that'd probably be the easiest way, as you're stumbling over your own words when you try and talk.
The best thing you can do is be brutefully honest. Talk about your dad giving you a hard time, and how you're trying to have your own life, and make your own decisions, while you have that overwhelming feeling that your parents advice is the critique you must meet. Explain to them that while their advice is welcome, it's often unnecessary, and part of developing as an adult is the seperation from parents trying to control development to parents observing development, with mutual influence.
> your own place for a reasonable rent.
Perhaps the reason why he doesn't want to is the guilt trip that would follow, as he says he's paying for food, and if he were to leave, so would the nutritions.
Cbx, you should really just basically print this up and hand it to your mom. You need to get things straightened out, and that'd probably be the easiest way, as you're stumbling over your own words when you try and talk.
The best thing you can do is be brutefully honest. Talk about your dad giving you a hard time, and how you're trying to have your own life, and make your own decisions, while you have that overwhelming feeling that your parents advice is the critique you must meet. Explain to them that while their advice is welcome, it's often unnecessary, and part of developing as an adult is the seperation from parents trying to control development to parents observing development, with mutual influence.
fuck that move out
I can't tell if you're 18 or not, but if you're paying your parents $400 a month rent, then they are assholes. Most parents will let their kids stay with them for free, or maybe $200 a month max. I assure you that $400 a month will cover more than half of their mortgage, and for the kid to be paying that is fucking rediculous. Start looking for an appartment, you can get them for $400 a month. If you're not 18 then you may need a parents co-sign, tell them you want your own place but you need them to co-sign, because for the price you're paying to stay with them will get you your own place and freedom. worse case they'll sympathize and let you pay less, or you move out. either way you win. you driving an escort? big deal, if you can't afford it then don't put yourself in debt to drive a nice car. many young kids out there are driving nice new cars cause their parents bought it for them, I doubt your parents will buy you a gallon of gas. You have to pay for your place to sleep, your car, and your insurrance. dude you are ready to live on your own. what do you need your parents for? for food? fuck find a roommate and the appartment will be half the price and you can eat like a king. no more bullshit. your parents are making money off your ass, and that's not how it should be. you need to move out asap and you're the type of person who can do it. lots of kids your age don't have jobs, don't pay for rent, cars, or even insurrance. they just live off mommy and daddy. you are paying your own way and don't need them at this point in your life. you work hard and should be enjoying life, not trying to prove to your dad you're worth something, because little does he know that you are.
I can't tell if you're 18 or not, but if you're paying your parents $400 a month rent, then they are assholes. Most parents will let their kids stay with them for free, or maybe $200 a month max. I assure you that $400 a month will cover more than half of their mortgage, and for the kid to be paying that is fucking rediculous. Start looking for an appartment, you can get them for $400 a month. If you're not 18 then you may need a parents co-sign, tell them you want your own place but you need them to co-sign, because for the price you're paying to stay with them will get you your own place and freedom. worse case they'll sympathize and let you pay less, or you move out. either way you win. you driving an escort? big deal, if you can't afford it then don't put yourself in debt to drive a nice car. many young kids out there are driving nice new cars cause their parents bought it for them, I doubt your parents will buy you a gallon of gas. You have to pay for your place to sleep, your car, and your insurrance. dude you are ready to live on your own. what do you need your parents for? for food? fuck find a roommate and the appartment will be half the price and you can eat like a king. no more bullshit. your parents are making money off your ass, and that's not how it should be. you need to move out asap and you're the type of person who can do it. lots of kids your age don't have jobs, don't pay for rent, cars, or even insurrance. they just live off mommy and daddy. you are paying your own way and don't need them at this point in your life. you work hard and should be enjoying life, not trying to prove to your dad you're worth something, because little does he know that you are.
Gil-Galad
New member
That situation that you're in totally sucks. i had a simular situation except that it was different in some ways from what youre telling here. I went and left when I was 15 years old. Yeah I was right but running away at my age wasnt the answer. I didnt have it together like you do. You are ready to live on your own forawhile. And see if you can make it. It's rough out there but at least you dont have someone knocking your self confidence down. And in this life you need all the confidence you can get because life can be hard. And life can be the best too.
I had it bad where no one talked to me about anything and made me do most of the work arround the house and never hardly thanks. And they favored the other kids my brother and sister. I was the oldest and they got cars first and they got college paid for and when they had kids they helped them take care of them and gave them lots of money and even gave both of them a house and I didnt get shit lol. But I've accepted that and moved on. I dont need them and I owe them nothing and i want it this way now. Back then I didnt know what to do because they would bully me all the time. And I was confused and when I was growing up my emotions was all messed up from growing up and the things going on at home.
See you're parents could be giving you a hint to move out. some people are really dishonest that way and would rather treat you like shit then tell you the truth. And you gotta figure it out yourself. On the other hand they might be messed up and then you gotta think about this old saying "I can chose my friends but I cant chose my family" and thats that move on in life. Dont put up with that crap. It took me awhile to break awhile from my family and I did it. But be carefull and make sure you're ready and dont make yourself miserable just because you want to get away.
I seen one of the messages about giving this post to your parents and that is a good idea and it also takes a lot of courage so just do it and see what happens and if that doesn wake them up then they dont deserv having you arround that simple. Well that's it for now. later
I had it bad where no one talked to me about anything and made me do most of the work arround the house and never hardly thanks. And they favored the other kids my brother and sister. I was the oldest and they got cars first and they got college paid for and when they had kids they helped them take care of them and gave them lots of money and even gave both of them a house and I didnt get shit lol. But I've accepted that and moved on. I dont need them and I owe them nothing and i want it this way now. Back then I didnt know what to do because they would bully me all the time. And I was confused and when I was growing up my emotions was all messed up from growing up and the things going on at home.
See you're parents could be giving you a hint to move out. some people are really dishonest that way and would rather treat you like shit then tell you the truth. And you gotta figure it out yourself. On the other hand they might be messed up and then you gotta think about this old saying "I can chose my friends but I cant chose my family" and thats that move on in life. Dont put up with that crap. It took me awhile to break awhile from my family and I did it. But be carefull and make sure you're ready and dont make yourself miserable just because you want to get away.
I seen one of the messages about giving this post to your parents and that is a good idea and it also takes a lot of courage so just do it and see what happens and if that doesn wake them up then they dont deserv having you arround that simple. Well that's it for now. later
The 9th Sage
New member
> Corey. Move out, get on your own.You can do this. I believe
> in you.
I agree really...besides the fam it sounds like you've got it together, better than I have certainly.
> in you.
I agree really...besides the fam it sounds like you've got it together, better than I have certainly.
cbxweb
Token Black Member
> and I dont know how bad a repo can be on your
> > credit....
>
> Very bad!
Yea, I found out by searching alittle on the internet. Well, Im making a plan now, since I start training to be a loan officer this tuesday. I plan to get one of those Infiniti G35's by the end of this year.
> > credit....
>
> Very bad!
Yea, I found out by searching alittle on the internet. Well, Im making a plan now, since I start training to be a loan officer this tuesday. I plan to get one of those Infiniti G35's by the end of this year
.