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Old 07-18-2007, 10:52 PM   #1
Vampire hunter D
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 530
Default Lobo Versus Japanese Anime!

Here's the prologue to a story I've decided to write, tell me what I should work on to make it better. I'll post more later.

LOBO
VS.
Japanese Animé


Book One:

Lobo Vs. Evangelion


Prologue


On an unnamed planet, a large man with ivory skin, red eyes, long, black hair in dread-locks and biker attire stands in a bar. He guzzles his drink, a strange concoction of various steaming chemicals that would kill any mere mortal, at least, one not equipped with the finest healing factor in the universe.
And even if it were to affect that, this man was kicked out of Heaven & Hell, so he would simply be resurrected if he were to die. This man's name is Lobo, the greatest bounty hunter there ever was, and ever will be.
Born on the planet Czarnia, a utopia where disease and war were unheard of, Lobo was born to a very unfortunate mother. Upon his delivery, the infant proceeded to devour the hand of the doctor who helped birth him, then massacred many of the hospital's staff with a scalpel he acquired. In his teen years, he began to wonder “If everyone looks like me, does that mean I'm not unique?”. This question puzzled him. So one night, he began working upon his high school science project/the means to finally make himself unique. He spent weeks holed up in his room, which were the most peaceful weeks in Czarnian history since he was born, conducting various experiments until he created the ultimate virus. On demonic wings these hellish creature flew, their scorpion-like bodies poised and ready to deliver death upon all who stood in their path. Fortunately for Lobo, he had developed an antidote for himself prior to releasing this plague of death upon the populace of his home planet.
After three agonizing days, the plague fulfilled its function, the annihilation of all of the citizens of Czarnia, save one. Filled with an unimaginable sense of joy over single-handedly whiping out an entire planet and finally being truly unique as the sole survivor, Lobo set off to explore the universe.
Lobo is equipped with an arsenal of highly powered guns and explosives, his trusty chain hook, his ability to breathe in space, his healing factor that can restore his entire body from a single drop of blood, his highly intuitive tracking ability that allows him to track anyone from anywhere in the universe simply by meeting them once, and finally, his brute strength. In little time at all, Lobo become the most feared and sought after bounty hunter in the galaxy. There's not a soul around who doesn't know of the last Czarnian's brutality as well as his strict honor code to NEVER go back on a promise. Once a promise has been made with Lobo, he will do whatever it takes to fulfill it, so long as the other party member/s keeps his/her side of the deal. Few have ever attempted to double-cross Lobo in a contract deal, and NONE lived long enough to regret it.
Now in this pathetic excuse for a bar, Lobo sits, waiting for his client. A small, furry, rat-like creature sits in a booth next to him, slurping a drink that resembles a vanilla float through a straw rather loudly. The sound annoys Lobo, invoking his contempt.
“Stop that fraggin' slurpin' before I shove that straw up yer ass and smash yer head inta the fraggin' table!” screamed an obviously irritated Lobo.
The small creature continued to slurp, now louder than before. Being unable to stand it anymore, Lobo grabbed said drink and forced it up said rodent's rectum.
“Graaaarrrgghghh.” He howled as the glass tore the inner workings of his colon. Then, Lobo grabbed him by his small neck and proceeded to smash his face into the table. With a crack and a wet slapping sound, the creature's face broke open and fragments of his now smashed head leaked over the floor. Satisfied with his handy work, Lobo sat back down. A short time later, Lobo's client entered the bar.
The man was draped in a dark cloak, covering his body and shielding his face from prying eyes. He sat down in the booth in front of Lobo and went straight to the point, skipping all formalities.
“I wish of you to take out a few “select” targets for me. At first, they were sort of a cultural thing, only a few people seemed to notice, nothing to worry about. It turns out I underestimated their power, and now they've grown far too strong in far too short of a time” His voice was low and raspy. He extended his hand and placed a strange, metallic device with a green, square screen protruding from the right side in front of Lobo.
“This device will not only show you your targets, but transport you to the world's in which they live instantly.”
“Pretty cool. So, how does it work?” Asked Lobo.
“It's simple, simply press the red button and it will show you your target and his or her information, the green button will send you to the world with which he or she inhabits. Fear not, I've set it so that it will react only to your voice and finger print after you have used it once.”
“Ya know, I normally wouldn't take such shady jobs, but ya seemed ta have paid me quite a generous sum up front, so what the frag?” Lobo reached out his hand and shook the strange man's.
“Good, now that we have a deal, here's your first assignment. For this, you'll have 500,000 credits added to your account upon completion.”
Upon the screen, the face of a dark-haired human of Asian descent appeared. Next to his picture was the name Shinji Ikari.
“He's as good as scragged.” Boasted Lobo, as he left the bar and leaped upon his bike. “Easiest 500k I ever made.”


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Old 07-19-2007, 12:50 AM   #2
Disch
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 4,387
Default Re: Lobo Versus Japanese Anime!

tl; dr
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