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Old 01-29-2005, 09:35 PM   #1
Kuikorosu
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Default Your RPG's story sucks.

So you've created a fun game, full of side adventures, sub quests, an interesting plot device, stunning graphics, moving music, a fun combat system...

So...what the HELL were you thinking when you put the story together?

Your well drawn, attractive characters have the personalities of cardboard. There's no character interaction. Your plot is just a pitiful excuse to move the game from chapter to chapter, with some of the -WORST- excuses as to why to lock you into a certain place.

OH NO, THERE ARE ROCKS ON THE TRAIN TRACKS.
(Complete chapter)
WE'VE MOVED THE ROCKS
(Next chapter)
OH NO, THERE ARE ROCKS ON THE TRAIN TRACKS.
(et al.)

It's enough to turn a love affair with a game into sour adultery. After digging into a game like Dark Cloud 2, I thought I was in heaven. All the things that make a game fun were in place. There's even a cute pink haired chick that you can put into a bikini with some effort.

But it all starting going sour. The "rocks on tracks" plot device. The lack of interesting character interaction. The two characters, despite spending months with each other, have absolutely no relationship above and beyond "two strangers who met and are now saving the world for some reason." I can't tell if the main character is 8 years old, gay, or what. He NEVER takes the opportunity to be slick and try to woo his attractive female companion. There's no shenanigans, no fun tomfoolery. Nothing.

The story never derails from the "let's go get the badguy, and make 7 chapter long delays on the way there" routine. It's so obvious that the people who made this game didn't give two shits about the story, they show you the final battle during the goddamn intro video.

The characters of, say, FFX might be shallow, but at least there's some (forced) interaction between them. DC2 has nothing going for it in the character/story development department. Why? What possessed a gaming company to DO something like this? You spend millions of dollars to make a game, and make the story suck total shit through a straw. It's an RPG for chrissakes. What's wrong with you? I've written better stories while bored in class.

In conclusion, if your character dialogue goes something like,
"Hey, let's go to starlight canyon!"
"Yeah, it'll be in starlight canyon!"
"I heard it's dangerous, though."
"Yeah, but we need to get through starlight canyon."
"Okay! Let's head out to starlight canyon!"

SCRAP IT FOR FUCK'S SAKE AND HIRE A WRITER.

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Old 02-01-2005, 04:11 AM   #2
The 9th Sage
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Default Re: Your RPG's story sucks.

After reading your need of tomfoolery, you should get something like Skies of Arcadia...great plot, fun characters with loads of personality, the swashbuckler system is cool, building your crew is great...I dunno, it's all good, except random combat gets too heavy sometimes...if you can stand that go for it...and it IS worth it.

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Old 02-01-2005, 06:40 AM   #3
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Default Re: Your RPG's story sucks.

Indeed he does.
Skies of Arcadia rocks.<img src=smilies/thumb.gif>

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Old 02-01-2005, 06:56 AM   #4
Kuikorosu
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Default Re: Your RPG's story sucks.

My main complaint, from that rant, about Dark Cloud 2 in particular (other RPGs are guilty, mind you) is that they've built such an awesome game, yet made the story so bland that it's intolerable.

It's like making a perfect piece of toast, then slathering it with gross store-brand butter with a cheap ripoff name of a major brand. It's still edible, but the enjoyment of the entire experience just drops through the floor.

Still, if Skies has the story, the enjoyable play mechanics and the obligatory pink haired anime babe, then sign me on. Heck, I'll be happy (but not -quite- as happy) if I just get the first two.

But my point still stands. Hire good writers, gaming companies. You won't regret it, especially when your dialogue goes like,

Tidus: Let's go back to Zanarkand!
Yuna: Okay!
Tidus: Yay! We'll go to Zanarkand!
Yuna: No... wait... I have... to stay... here...
Tidus: But I wanna go back to Zanarkand!
Yuna: But...
Tidus: Zanarkand! Blitzball! Zanarkand!
Yuna: (Starts crying)
(Cue sappy music, pretty FMV with Japanese girl singing in the background, as they kiss in a pool of water, just like on the case of the game)
Tidus: This is pretty good, but not as good as Zanarkand!

I mean, shit. (Especially since I treated Yuna like shit through the entire game, and still get this scene)

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Old 02-02-2005, 03:07 AM   #5
The 9th Sage
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Default Re: Your RPG's story sucks.

> My main complaint, from that rant, about Dark Cloud 2 in
> particular (other RPGs are guilty, mind you) is that they've
> built such an awesome game, yet made the story so bland that
> it's intolerable.

Yeah, I know....a good story goes a long way in a game..

> Still, if Skies has the story, the enjoyable play mechanics
> and the obligatory pink haired anime babe, then sign me on.
> Heck, I'll be happy (but not -quite- as happy) if I just get
> the first two.

Well, there's a babe with blonde hair, and one with orange hair...but actually, come to think of it, there is a pink haired chick who's like an 'evil' (well sort of...to say too much would spoil it...actually, I think that's one of the quests exclusive to the Cube version) version of Aika, the girl with the orange hair.

> Tidus: Let's go back to Zanarkand!

The dialouge is actually like that? I could write better than that in my sleep.

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Old 02-02-2005, 02:27 PM   #6
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Default Re: Your RPG's story sucks.

> The dialouge is actually like that? I could write better
> than that in my sleep.

As someone who played the game throughly, it's a little exaggerated, but the general theme is that. I actually liked it, but that's probably mostly because the excellent graphics and abundance of voice acting making it easier to relate to the characters rather than any actual strength in the plot. I still related better to the characters in Chrono Trigger or Tales of Phantasia simply because the character interaction and scripts were much better.

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