PDA

View Full Version : Mormonism

Skip Freethrow
08-31-2006, 10:19 PM
If you want to learn about this religion read the book of Revelations. Enjoy.
<P ID="signature"></P>
shawn
08-31-2006, 10:24 PM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.
>
Mormonism or moronism? Which is this subject? <img src=smilies/cwm11.gif>
<P ID="signature">Definition of Gross: Finding a used condom at the bottom of your jar of mayonaise. </P>
king killa
08-31-2006, 10:24 PM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.
>

If you want to piss people off, keep doing what you're doing.
<P ID="signature">http://hwody.comKilla's Blog</a></P>
Skip Freethrow
08-31-2006, 10:48 PM
> If you want to piss people off, keep doing what you're
> doing.
>

I really don't feel like responding to a flame bait thread.
<P ID="signature"></P>
king killa
08-31-2006, 10:49 PM
> I really don't feel like responding to a flame bait thread.
>

Then why did you start one?
<P ID="signature">http://hwody.comKilla's Blog</a></P>
Reaper man
08-31-2006, 11:00 PM
> Then why did you start one?

<center><img src=http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c196/reaper_man/ohsnap.jpg></center>
<P ID="signature"></P>
shawn
08-31-2006, 11:10 PM
> > Then why did you start one?
>
That's one hell of a cramp he's got there. <img src=smilies/laff.gif>
<P ID="signature">Definition of Gross: Finding a used condom at the bottom of your jar of mayonaise. </P>
pipes
09-01-2006, 12:01 AM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.

I should convert so I can fuck many women!<img src=smilies/thumb.gif>
I love christianity distros!
<P ID="signature">The pipes clangor all the time!</P>
shawn
09-01-2006, 12:05 AM
> I should convert so I can fuck many women!
> I love christianity distros!

I found out one of my ancestor *my aunt does geneology* was a mormon founder or just below him. Well when his mentor <--? died my relative had 53 wives. You know it sounds great till they all have thier time of the month on the same day, lol. <img src=smilies/laff.gif>
<P ID="signature">Definition of Gross: Finding a used condom at the bottom of your jar of mayonaise. </P>
Cornellius
09-01-2006, 12:18 AM
You're the starter here.
Stop trying to be cool.
<P ID="signature">http://img284.imageshack.us/img284/7617/guinessdrinker40fi.jpg
http://img368.imageshack.us/img368/3997/poker27ma.jpg</P>
king killa
09-01-2006, 01:47 AM
> You're the starter here.
> Stop trying to be cool.
>

His first post was telling us to read about mormonism. How am I the starter? You canadians have some fucked up perspectives.
<P ID="signature">http://hwody.comKilla's Blog</a></P>
CEpeep
09-01-2006, 01:49 AM
Moved to the Backroom.
<P ID="signature">http://vote5chuckpoland.ytmnd.com/<font size="-2">WOAH THIS BASS IS INTENSE</font></a></P>
Cornellius
09-01-2006, 02:58 AM
And how was asking to read a book about mormonism is a flamebait ?

You americans have some fucked up perspectives.
<P ID="signature">http://img284.imageshack.us/img284/7617/guinessdrinker40fi.jpg
http://img368.imageshack.us/img368/3997/poker27ma.jpg</P>
maq112k2
09-01-2006, 03:25 AM
> And how was asking to read a book about mormonism is a
> flamebait ?
Look at the topic. Look at the icon. The intent is clear. I'm with Killa on this one.

> You americans have some fucked up perspectives.
I believe it is you who is wrong.

<P ID="signature">http://elazulspad.net/blaxor/ricky/banner.png</P>
shawn
09-01-2006, 03:52 AM
> Look at the topic. Look at the icon. The intent is clear.
> I'm with Killa on this one.

Exactly why I said what I posted also. <img src=smilies/magbiggrin.gif>
<P ID="signature">Definition of Gross: Finding a used condom at the bottom of your jar of mayonaise. </P>
JadussD
09-01-2006, 04:22 AM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.
>

You were a guy who used to post here a long time ago. What was your other name? You ain't grits are ye?
<P ID="signature"></P>
Skip Freethrow
09-01-2006, 04:41 AM
> > I really don't feel like responding to a flame bait
> thread.
> >
>
> Then why did you start one?
>

Because of people like you?
<P ID="signature"></P>
Disch
09-01-2006, 05:10 AM
> > > I really don't feel like responding to a flame bait thread.
> > Then why did you start one?
> Because of people like you?

That.... doesn't even make sense....

you might as well have said "your mom"
<P ID="signature"></P>
CEpeep
09-01-2006, 05:21 AM
UR MOM
<P ID="signature">http://vote5chuckpoland.ytmnd.com/<font size="-2">WOAH THIS BASS IS INTENSE</font></a></P>
Slicer S. V.
09-01-2006, 09:31 AM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.

What the squats does the book of Revelations have to do with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, if I may ask? Of any biblical reference to us that I would choose, I would find Isaiah and James are more likely candidates.
<P ID="signature">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v247/SlicerSV/misc/Searthsig.png
My Work In Progress</P>
Vampire hunter D
09-01-2006, 03:35 PM
Singers: Joseph Smith was called a prophet
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
He started the Mormon religion
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Blacksmith: There goes that kooky Joseph Smith
Customer: You know, he claims he spoke with God and Jesus.
Woman: Well, how do you know he didn't?
Singers: Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Joseph Smith was called a prophet-
Butler: Hey, Joseph! I told my wife that you spoke with God and Jesus, and she didn't believe it.
Smith: Well it's true. I did.
Wife: Where?
Smith: I was out in the woods, praying [a shot of him on his knees in the woods] I was asking God if I should be a Protestant, or a Catholic, or what? And suddenly God and Jesus appeared before me. [a bright light appears before him and he shields his eyes from the glare] And they said I should start my own church, because none of the others had it right. [the flashback ends] And that's exactly how it happened.
Butler: You see? You believe it now?
Wife: Well yeah, sure. Why would he make that up?
Singers: Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Many people believed Joseph
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
And that night he-ee saw an angel
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Smith: [in bed inside a shack] And please bless Mother and Father, and please keep our bellies full of yum-yums and luscious goodies. [a flash of light and a glowing orb carroms around the room] AAAHH! [the orb turns into an angel] Oh my gosh!
Angel: I am Moroni. I am a Native American.
Smith: A... [looks at the camera] Native American? [looks at Moroni] But your skin is white.
Moroni: Yes. Long ago all Native American were white. We all came to America from Jerusalem. And while we were here we were visited by Christ.
Smith: [looks at the camera] Jesus lived here in America?
Moroni: Yes. Eventually, my people were all killed by the other tribe of Israel, and as punishment, God turned their skin red. These are the Native Americans you know today. [Smith looks at the camera dumbstruck]
Singers: Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Moroni: There is an ancient book buried near here, written on gold plates that account my people's lives. Also buried with the book are two seer stones, the Urim and Thummim, which will allow you to translate the writings. Find it, and fulfill your destiny. [brightens and then vanishes]
Smith: Wooww... [gets up and dressed. He exits his shack]
Singers: Joseph Smith was called a prophet
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
<P ID="signature">--------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://img143.imageshack.us/img143/3734/goofyav1qg.jpg</img></P>
CEpeep
09-01-2006, 03:43 PM
Wins.
<P ID="signature">http://vote5chuckpoland.ytmnd.com/<font size="-2">WOAH THIS BASS IS INTENSE</font></a></P>
Disch
09-01-2006, 06:26 PM
You mock it... but is it really any less crazy and ridiculous than the stories of Super Jesus?
<P ID="signature"></P>
CEpeep
09-01-2006, 06:28 PM
> You mock it... but is it really any less crazy and
> ridiculous than the stories of Super Jesus?

Xenu > Super Jesus
<P ID="signature">http://vote5chuckpoland.ytmnd.com/<font size="-2">WOAH THIS BASS IS INTENSE</font></a></P>
MonsieurSirhan
09-01-2006, 08:33 PM
> Smith: I was out in the woods, praying [a shot of him on his
> knees in the woods] I was asking God if I should be a
> Protestant, or a Catholic, or what? And suddenly God and
> Jesus appeared before me. [a bright light appears before him
> and he shields his eyes from the glare] And they said I

> should start my own church, because none of the others had
> it right. [the flashback ends] And that's exactly how it
> happened.

Yessarooni Positooni!
<P ID="signature">_- | -_
</P>
Mikey
09-01-2006, 10:05 PM
> If you want to learn about this religion read the book of
> Revelations. Enjoy.
>

Maybe I will. I've always wanted to have sex with my sisters. <img src=smilies/thumb.gif>
<P ID="signature"></P>
Slicer S. V.
09-01-2006, 11:00 PM
> Maybe I will. I've always wanted to have sex with my
> sisters.

For the record, no decent member of the church has done this and remained a member. Not only that, but we haven't practiced polygamy since EARLY in Utah. Prior to Utah even becoming a state they were told that the time was passed for that.

The most likely reason for us to have had that at all, and it wasn't even widespread, was because of the disturbing male - female ratio in the early church, and the amount of women who were widows. Once we started having more men around again and the re-married widows were all passed on, there wasn't any more reason for it, and since it was largely problematic anyways, God said stop, and those who wouldn't stop were excommunicated.
<P ID="signature">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v247/SlicerSV/misc/Searthsig.png
My Work In Progress</P>
Mikey
09-01-2006, 11:34 PM
> For the record, no decent member of the church has done this
> and remained a member. Not only that, but we haven't
> practiced polygamy since EARLY in Utah. Prior to Utah even
> becoming a state they were told that the time was passed for
> that.

Way to give up my hopes. <img src=smilies/cry.gif>
<P ID="signature"></P>
CEpeep
09-02-2006, 03:31 AM
> God said stop

oic
<P ID="signature">http://vote5chuckpoland.ytmnd.com/<font size="-2">WOAH THIS BASS IS INTENSE</font></a></P>
juggaleaux
09-02-2006, 07:15 AM
<img src=http://www.elazulspad.net/ubbthreads/attachments/17428-jesusknockknock.jpg>
<P ID="signature"></P>
shawn
09-02-2006, 12:24 PM
Knock knock!!

Who's there?

Candygram. <img src=smilies/magbiggrin.gif>
<P ID="signature">Definition of Gross: Finding a used condom at the bottom of your jar of mayonaise. </P>
Skip Freethrow
09-07-2006, 09:13 AM
Having lived in Salt Lake my entire life all I have to say is that Utahns are assholes. Social elitists and retards. You can't live here unless you do what they say. I really don't have too much else to say about the topic.
<P ID="signature"></P>
Disch
09-07-2006, 04:15 PM
> Having lived in Salt Lake my entire life all I have to say
> is that Utahns are assholes. Social elitists and retards.
> You can't live here unless you do what they say. I really
> don't have too much else to say about the topic.

You need to watch http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0133189/SLC Punk</a>

<P ID="signature"></P>
JadussD
09-07-2006, 05:19 PM
> Having lived in Salt Lake my entire life all I have to say
> is that Utahns are assholes. Social elitists and retards.
> You can't live here unless you do what they say. I really
> don't have too much else to say about the topic.

Why don't you move? Or start a terrorist organization called "Utahans Against Utahans" which aims to depopulate Utah, and then turns on itself?
<P ID="signature"></P>
king killa
09-07-2006, 07:13 PM
> You need to watch SLC Punk
>

Damn, beat me to it.
<P ID="signature">http://hwody.comKilla's Blog</a></P>