Fla Flash
06-18-2002, 12:58 AM
Okay, guess who I got email from today?
Ash. And it goes like this:
Dear Diary,
I'm laying there sleeping when Misty starts shaking me. I'm half asleep and she asks me if I have Krabby. I kinda rolled over and said, "no, he evolved into Kingler".
Then she screams "Crabs!"
Jesus. I jump up and she's scratchin her crotch like she had sex with Poison Ivy. I look off to the side and Brock's scratchin' like crazy too. I jump up and run down to the stream. Shit I ain't even itching. No livestock on me. So I smirk...and I think. This is gonna be fun.
Togepei, not havin' any hair can't catch 'em. But that little yellow rat of mine can. I have a long talk with Pika, tell him Misty needs to learn a lesson, and it will actually be fun, so he, giggling in that sickeningly cute way, agrees. She and Brock are still scratching their asses off. Pikachu chases Togepei right over Misty and gets a few of the hoppers on him. Needless to say I'm delighted.
Pikachu keeps his distance that night. "Pik," I say, "we know Team Asshole is gonna mess with us tomorrow. Just let em catch you for a few minutes."
Pikachu understood. He smiled and said "Pika!".
God, that's getting old, too.
So, sure enough, we're walking along. Misty asks, "Hey Ash,", scratching her crotch violently, "why isn't Pikachu riding on your shoulder?"
"Good exercise,", I respond, and look down at my most loyal pokemon.
Pikachu responds by shoving a fist in the air and saying "Pika!".
Ya gotta love the litte guy.
So anyway, I see this coming. Typical team Rocket rat shit trap. Couldn't catch a cold with it. But this time I fell for it.
We fall in the hole, listen to their bullshit speech. And they grab Pikachu. Only I scream, while they're taking him that it's not fair, he doesn't have his thunderbolt attack working. Hehe. They swallowed that too.
They were fucking with Meowth, tossing Pikachu back and forth. After ten minutes of that shit, I issued the command.
"Pikachu, thunderbolt"
Needless to say, he fried the bunch. And when Pikachu came back, he was scratching his privates. "Oh, no,Pikachu, are you allright?"
"Pika-crabs" was all he said.
I turned and looked at Misty and Brock. "So this is how come it's taken me a full fucking cartoon season to get half-fucking-way through the fucking Jotho fucking league?"
I stood up. "You've been sleeping with the enemy."
Misty looked indignant and Brock started stuttering....
I looked at them steely. "Joo Bastids.". I turned my back, and they followed at a distance.
Pikachu looked up at me. "Yeah, " smiling, "I'll take care of you the next stream we come to. You earned you're spot."
Ash
I'll send ol Flash another soon.
<P ID="signature"><img src=http://theflash.freehosting.net/images/ff.jpg>
pl-l33l2 l\/ly $p33l)!</P>
Ash. And it goes like this:
Dear Diary,
I'm laying there sleeping when Misty starts shaking me. I'm half asleep and she asks me if I have Krabby. I kinda rolled over and said, "no, he evolved into Kingler".
Then she screams "Crabs!"
Jesus. I jump up and she's scratchin her crotch like she had sex with Poison Ivy. I look off to the side and Brock's scratchin' like crazy too. I jump up and run down to the stream. Shit I ain't even itching. No livestock on me. So I smirk...and I think. This is gonna be fun.
Togepei, not havin' any hair can't catch 'em. But that little yellow rat of mine can. I have a long talk with Pika, tell him Misty needs to learn a lesson, and it will actually be fun, so he, giggling in that sickeningly cute way, agrees. She and Brock are still scratching their asses off. Pikachu chases Togepei right over Misty and gets a few of the hoppers on him. Needless to say I'm delighted.
Pikachu keeps his distance that night. "Pik," I say, "we know Team Asshole is gonna mess with us tomorrow. Just let em catch you for a few minutes."
Pikachu understood. He smiled and said "Pika!".
God, that's getting old, too.
So, sure enough, we're walking along. Misty asks, "Hey Ash,", scratching her crotch violently, "why isn't Pikachu riding on your shoulder?"
"Good exercise,", I respond, and look down at my most loyal pokemon.
Pikachu responds by shoving a fist in the air and saying "Pika!".
Ya gotta love the litte guy.
So anyway, I see this coming. Typical team Rocket rat shit trap. Couldn't catch a cold with it. But this time I fell for it.
We fall in the hole, listen to their bullshit speech. And they grab Pikachu. Only I scream, while they're taking him that it's not fair, he doesn't have his thunderbolt attack working. Hehe. They swallowed that too.
They were fucking with Meowth, tossing Pikachu back and forth. After ten minutes of that shit, I issued the command.
"Pikachu, thunderbolt"
Needless to say, he fried the bunch. And when Pikachu came back, he was scratching his privates. "Oh, no,Pikachu, are you allright?"
"Pika-crabs" was all he said.
I turned and looked at Misty and Brock. "So this is how come it's taken me a full fucking cartoon season to get half-fucking-way through the fucking Jotho fucking league?"
I stood up. "You've been sleeping with the enemy."
Misty looked indignant and Brock started stuttering....
I looked at them steely. "Joo Bastids.". I turned my back, and they followed at a distance.
Pikachu looked up at me. "Yeah, " smiling, "I'll take care of you the next stream we come to. You earned you're spot."
Ash
I'll send ol Flash another soon.
<P ID="signature"><img src=http://theflash.freehosting.net/images/ff.jpg>
pl-l33l2 l\/ly $p33l)!</P>