second guessing

[Lobster Cowboy]

ugh ugh ugh

i thought after i made the decision, things would be smooth sailing...

um, no.

i informed the sick girl about my choice, and she writes me this really moving letter about how she's happy for me, because while she would have loved to have a relationship with me, she felt better that i was with someone who had more time for me. it was so selfless and sweet....and so troubling. i feel like reversing my decision, yelling at the top of my lungs, "I CHOOSE YOU!"

but i don't know...who knows when she'll ever be well enough. and i do like the girl i'm with. it feels like the whole "bird in the hand" conundrum.

holy fuck i'm confused. fuck fuck fuck...

life really was better when i was single

<P ID="signature">http://socialistlobster.tripod.com/lobsterranx.txt</img> (http://www.mozilla.org)</P>

[puduhead]

> life really was better when i was single

It gets really confusing. I can relate. And I think many guys have this struggle where, once they commit themselves to someone, other prospects start looking good to them... maybe even better or more appealing.

Something I have learned over the years is that once you are in a relationship, it's easy to see the downsides. But if you were able to step back and see it as you did at the very beginning, you might be surprised how much of a good choice it seems.

Bottom line: If you are committed to someone, you should give it your best to see what will come of it. Either you are not ready to be committed, or you need to give the relationship you are in a chance.

I don't know that this advice is very romantic, so much as formulaic. But that's how I see it.

<P ID="signature"><img src=http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-9/377023/puduhead.jpg></P>

[Tsyni]

> life really was better when i was single

hehe, sure is easier that way...did you not hear my previous suggestion my friend? both at once! hazaazazaza!!!

Do lobsters even have ears?

<P ID="signature">--//--
What do you do, how tired do you get when each day you struggle against an entire culture based on the normalization of trauma-inducing behavior? There is no sanctuary.</P>

[Isildur]

Man, that sounds painful. =(

But if you do like the girl you're with, and given the situation as it stands now (that is, that you already stated a decision), it seems to me you should go ahead and give it a shot. Unfortunately, one can't always make everyone happy, and wavering in indecision because one doesn't want to hurt anyone can end up make things worse for everyone.

Then again, I'm not a relationship expert by any stretch of the imagination, and I know hardly anything about the two girls, so I guess I probably shouldn't be trying to give advice. Maybe I have it all wrong.

Well, whatever you decide, I wish you the best of luck with it.

<P ID="signature"><center>http://pages.nyu.edu/~jc73/misc/FieryAshNazg.gif</center></P>

[StormsInHerEyes]

dude chicks always do that.. to make you feel bad.. stay with the girl your with I say she sounds like a keeper.. stay friends with the sick girl though.. no sense in ruining something if things dont work out

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